Two in one week?

Yes, I realize this is just after my earlier post. Things like this make me wonder if I'm not a little bit bipolar.

Just been feeling really lonely and depressed since yesterday.

Things that have been going on. Got a surprising compliment from an ex. Makes me wonder if I made a mistake. I don't think so, because there were plenty of issues other than mine, but still.

Betsy was "confused" about whether she should go to classes when they were holding SOLs that she has already taken. I told her unless a teacher specifically tells her that she doesn't have to show up, she has to show up. Simple mistake, or teenage rebellion?

Just barely stopped myself from more impulse retail therapy online today. And been feeling weepy. Since last night. Even though nothing is really wrong.

Saw a new dating site: HerWay. Men post profiles, but only women can send emails. Sadie Hawkins-ish. Thought about it, cause I'm tired of being lonely. Will ponder some more, I'm sure.

Is it ever a good idea to see if there's a chance for something more in an existing friendship? Haven't really ended well for me so far. Then again, none of my relationships seem to have ended well. A friend of mine is right, I do seem to have a thing for unavailable women. Either through distance, physical or emotional, there just seems to be this desire for a little space. I just don't get it.

Maybe this is the way it's supposed to be. Maybe I am too old to date anymore. Last week, I was all full of hope and optimism, and this week just seems to suck. I'm sure I could get prescribed some sort of medication to even this out, but knowing me, my "neutral position" is probably most people's "depression". Plus, I am a little afraid of mood-altering medication. Good thing I can't drink, I guess.

Yes, today is 20 years in the Fed Govt, and what do I have to show for it? An ok job, with an ok salary. I need to travel more and get away from myself, I think.